Thursday, January 5, 2017

My First Trimester Love Affair


This post was written in the early Fall but I was too nauseous to sit down and publish it so here we are. Nausea is gone and I can't stop eating but that's for another post....



It's ready, they're calling my name. My only way to sneak in vegetables these days, a cheddar-dripping bagel hiding very small pieces of broccoli. I lied. Sometimes I can eat my one-of-a-kind salad that might make you vomit (and in other circumstance me too) so maybe skip the next line. Mesclun greens, chopped tomatoes, olives, ketchup, cottage cheese and sauerkraut.

Lulu calls it "Funny Salad"
(Confession: Sometimes it's the only dinner I can make us).
Don't try this at home!
I'm walking to the pier. First time I recognize that Fall is here. The breeze is now officially wind but I must sit down now and consume this bagel within 30-45 seconds or so. Wait this is NOT cheddar! In one breath I move from wanting to kill whoever messed up my order to inhaling the whole bagel with gusto. Done. No aversion detected and I should thank my lucky stars since I have aversions to most things these days. Not to bagels though. Or any kind of cheese (though the saltier the better). That's it, pretty much. I can't eat, smell, see or even think about most types of food, especially those that I'm normally obsessed with. That's why I can't type up what I'm talking about but believe me, my normal-days diet consists of the most nutrient-dense super foods...until week 6, when I woke up and couldn't bear the idea of coffee (oops why did I type the word?! Bagel starting to come up. Please go back down). 

Back to ingested bagel. After heightened sensations of pleasure reverberating through my body while consuming it, I am nauseous, again. 

In all its glory, top pleasure of my first trimester

At night my nausea hits the gas pedal and I find myself stuck in those 5 seconds between feeling so nauseous I could throw up and actually throwing up.  You know what I'm talking about. It's like purgatory. No way out. Just embrace the sensation. Trust me I have taken the vomiting route a few times under the delusion that relief is on the way but nope better be stuck in purgatory.  I spend a few hours in those 5 seconds, waiting for relief so I can go to sleep or I end up sucking the life out of another lemon which is a hit or miss. When it's a hit I run to bed before the effect runs out.  

And then....

Week 12 I wake up wanting, no- needing coffee. Skeptically I sleepwalk into the kitchen, fantasies sprinkling my brain about the possibility of no longer sleepwalking half the day thanks my drug-of-choice making a glorious comeback. As the grinder spreads aroma that used to bring me to ecstasy, my stomach only half-turns, which is my signal to proceed. 
I take a deep breath as I sit down and suspiciously dunk my morning biscotti until it's heavily soaked in my coffee. Entry granted. Then a full sip and another bigger sip tell me that we are in the clear! Ban has been lifted! Coffee is BACK!

I mistakenly decide to test other aversions throughout the day. Don't try this at home. Let it come to you. Aversions make a lot of noise as they leave the building. They signal clearly that you are in the clear and by week 14 (any day now!) most of them are replaced with insatiable passion for food. And cravings? I can't wait to find out if my cheddar-grilled- cheese-bagel will continue to be my master. I hope not. My bread-and-cheese filled body needs its superfoods back!